Robocop 3 – Retro Wednesdays Episode 33

In this episode we take a look at imgresthe last game in the Robocop trilogy. Robocop 3. After last week’s Robocop 2 disaster I came in with very low expectations and I was not surprised. Robocop 3 is equally as bad as the 2nd one but in a slightly different way. Gone is the inertia from Robocop 2 that made me want to shut off the game, but in its place is just as bad gameplay and so many menu items you spend more time getting hit because you’re trying to read what’s on the top of the freaking screen.

I won’t go into the story other than it does somewhat follow the movies you move around and shoot. The move animations take precedents over shooting so expect to get hit a lot while doing something as simple as freaking ducking. You also need to keep an eye on your top screen because you can take damage on specific parts of your body.

Yeah you have damage management in a Nintendo game. It couldn’t possibly go wrong… Basically after each level you have repair points and you can repair your head, chest, arms or legs. Keep in mind you get hit a ton so you’ll never be able to get back up to 100% ever, plus if you have a body part damaged the game will literally “malfunction” while you’re playing. If your head goes to 0% you will start to have your controls randomly reversed (right is left, left is right), your legs make you stop walking and your arms stop shooting. I’m not sure what the chest does but I mean seriously, what the hell is the point of that other than to royally piss me off. If the controls were good I wouldn’t mind it but they are HORRIBLE so you inevitably take a ton of damage then have an even further disadvantage to an already unfair game. Robocop 3 ends up taking something “innovative” and turns it into such a hinderance you don’t want to play the game.

Robocop 3 ultimately is another forgettable game in the NES library and it’s one I’m super disappointed in. You have such good source material to take from and you end up with boring, uninspired platformer with horrible controls, boring enemies that you don’t care about with no satisfaction when it comes to beating them, a confusing muddles damage system that will inevitably kill you, hits that you cannot avoid, music that sucks, sound effects that suck, and cut scenes that you could care less about. Robocop is just a game you should avoid.

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