I love that you are so portable and your battery life is friggin’ amazing. I love how quick you are to open and do things that I would normally wait minutes for on a laptop. I love how easy it is to get programs (I refuse to call them apps) and install them on you. I love how I do not have to have a 2 year contract if I want cellular data for you. I love having the ability to sit on a plane and watch movies over and over in High Def on you. I love how intuitive you are. I love how you take care of updates and software management without me even noticing. I love how you are my first real Apple product and I can see why people like them. I love using you as a GPS in the car. I love how you (unlike your brother the iPhone4) seem to get amazing wireless and 3g signal no matter where I am. I love using Remote Desktop with you. I love that no matter how many programs I have open on you, there is never any slow down. I love the dynamic of your touch screen and how it is an immersive experience.
I hate you, you stupid iPad. I hate how I have to pay for EVERYTHING I want to do on you. I hate how you are a fingerprint magnet. I hate how something so simple to use requires complex planning to do mundane tasks. I hate your almost internet you provide. I hate how I have to spend money to use something for free (Google Docs). I hate your stupid one port… ONE port that I can connect something to. I hate how when I use you I have to spend 15 minutes answering “Yes it is an iPad” and letting other people touch you, adding to the fingerprints. I hate that you have no camera. I hate how I had to jailbreak you in order to get some productivity and backgrounding. I hate how you put me in Steve Jobs head. I hate how you make me a slave to iTunes. I hate that I had to pay money for remote desktop for you, and I had to in order to do work on a real computer. I hate your keyboard that I can’t feel.